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Screensize: 640 x 480 800 x 600 1024 x 768 1280 x 1024 UserName: Password: Format Mode: Basic  Help  Prompt  Format: Font Andale Mono Arial Arial Black Book Antiqua Century Gothic Comic Sans MS Courier New Georgia Impact Lucida Console Script MT Bold Stencil Tahoma Times New Roman Trebuchet MS Verdana   Size 1 2 3 4 5 6   Color Black Red Yellow Pink Green Orange Purple Blue Beige Brown Teal Navy Maroon LimeGreen Message: * HTML is OFF * Forum Code is ON Smilies [quote][i]Originally posted by Chaz[/i] [br] > >Q: Should I have a baby after 35? >A: No, 35 children is enough. > >Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move? >A: With any luck, right after he finishes college. > >Q: What is the most common pregnancy craving? >A: For men to be the ones who get pregnant. > >Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex? >A: Childbirth. > >Q: The more pregnant I get, the more often strangers smile at me. Why? >A: 'Cause you're fatter than they are. > >Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's >borderline irrational. >A: So what's your question? > >Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, >but >pressure. Is she right? >A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current. > >Q: When is the best time to get an epidural? >A: Right after you find out you're pregnant. > >Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife >is in >labor? >A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you. > >Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth? >A: Yes, pregnancy. > >Q: Do I have to have a baby shower? >A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly. > >Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act >normal again? >A: When the kids are in college. [img]http://www.abstract-thoughts.co.uk/mkda/sig.jpg[/img] [/quote]   Check here to include your profile signature.